Getting back on the horse.

It's been a while since my last post.  And I know some of my faithful readers (ahem Erika) have been waiting.  So I'll start with why it has taken so long for me to write.  I kind of fell off the horse a bit.  There hasn't been any weight gain, per say, but it's my special lady time (or shark week as I like to call it) and my cravings are up, my motivation is down, and my discomfort is through the roof.  Normally I'm pretty good about redirecting my cravings but this is the first cycle I've had to go through on this program and I wasn't really prepared for it.  So I caved.  I'm not going to list out what I ate because then I'll start thinking about food again, and I don't want that to happen.  I will tell you that there are about 437 better ways for me to spend that money.  And next time, I think what I'll do is write down a few and use that as my motivation not to spend it.  The great thing is, that the only weight that I've gained is that the normal water/bloating weight.  So in a few days when this is all behind me I'll be able to see where I'm at and what the actual damage was.  Another contributing factor was that I ran out of the bars and snacks that I like.  I guess I underestimated how many I would actually eat. So, this time around, my whole order was bars, shakes, and snacks since I still have the soups and chili left from the first order.  Hopefully, this won't happen again. I experienced a bit of a setback at the gym this week as well. My physical therapist has been out of town, and of course my leg would start bothering me.  I tried to run last week and I was fine until 2 days later and I've been in pain ever since.  I put icy hot on before and after working out and take Excedrin just to dull the pain a bit so I can make it through the workout.  But it doesn't really help. I feel it, and it's terrible.  I'm trying to push through the pain because nursing my wounds won't help any.  No pain, no gain right?

I've decided to join a gym.  The base gym is nice and everything but it's too far for me to go to on the weekends and all of the classes they offer are during the day when I'm at work.  The gym down the street offers Zumba (which I love), night classes, circuits, a separate workout room for women (which is great!), and a 5 am boot camp class.  I'm going to find a way to wake up that early and go to one to see how it is.  I got a free trial for it so we'll see.  Fingers crossed that it works out for me. I just feel so lost at the gym most days, the classes will help a lot and they have trainers on site.

So what do we take away from this?  Periods suck, and if you're a guy reading this I apologize but you kids had to learn someday. lol But even though they happen, and they just rip your insides out and make you feel and think irrational things, you have to deal with it just like everything else.  I'm hoping that my week of weakness will help you all see that falling down is just as important as getting back up.  The only thing you have to be careful of is how long you stay down once you get there. It's ok to fall but try not to linger and don't dwell on it.  If you do, you'll drive yourself insane and you'll prolong your stay.  So, I'm getting up, dusting myself off, and getting back on the horse. It's definitely going to be a bumpy ride, but I'm strapped in and ready.  I have a few months to get this right and I'm determined to see this through.

End of Week 2.

I have successfully completed my 2nd week on the Take Shape for Life program. It seems like it's been longer than 2 weeks but not in a bad way.  I got a little discouraged and down on myself in the middle of the week, but I'm chalking it up to bad weather and crazy scheduling due to the hurricane that was supposed to hit the area. I ended up being off work on tuesday and wednesday, the whole town was shut down.  Those 2 days off threw my schedule way off.  On top of that, I went against my plan and was weighing myself.  And I was doing it in the middle of the day when I was at my heaviest so of course the numbers were off but it still made me feel terrible.  3 days with no weight change and I thought about giving up.  I didn't though.

It took a lot for me to stay on track this week.  Normally I would eat whatever, feel like shit, throw a pity party, and then jump back on the wagon.  I didn't want to lose progress so I did whatever I could to make sure I didn't fall off this time.  I held on, and at the end of the week saw that I actually did lose weight. I just couldn't see it.  I lost 4 lbs this week, a total of 9 lbs so far.  I can't remember the last time I lost 9 lbs, or how long it took me.  I'm very pleased with my progress physically and mentally.  I can feel myself getting stronger and I know that if I stick with it, I'll be able to meet my goals. 

With an average weight loss of 2-5 lbs per week, 4 lbs isn't bad.  I did slack off on my gym sessions a bit, I only went on Monday and Friday...and I only did about 30 minutes of cardio on those days.  So 4lbs with limited effort is a pretty good result.  I know I could do way better, and my goal for next week is to do just that.  My work schedule will be back to normal so it should be easy.

If any of you take anything away from this post let it be these things:
1.  Don't become a slave to the scale.  I'm not saying not to weigh yourself but put the scale in a place that's really inconvenient.  Somewhere you can't see it, or you'll be tempted to step on it.  I had mine in the hall closet, I'm going to move it since I go in that closet everyday.  And if you do weigh yourself, make sure it's first thing in the morning.  If you do it in the afternoon or at night, your reading will be off. 

2.   Don't give up on yourself.  You are the only person that can be responsible for your weight loss.  No one else can lose the weight for you.  You have to realize that even the smallest slip up can send you into a downward spiral.  You get stressed or upset and you allow yourself one cheat.  Then you feel guilty about that cheat, and then you have another.  It's a slippery slope, but you're the only one that can pull yourself back up. When you're feeling some kind of way, sit down and figure out why.  Find a way to redirect those feelings. If your usual response to stress is to eat, find another activity to take the place of food.  Relax in the bath tub, read a good book, talk to someone that makes you feel happy.  But it's up to you to keep yourself on track.  Be your biggest fan.

My relationship with myself is getting a little better.  I'm going to continue to work on it until it's back where it used to be.  And I'm going to keep on moving forward and keep improving.  I'm aiming for 10 lbs next week, so we'll see how that goes. 

Until next time....